Meanest story nominee: Reese Witherspoon's brain surgery drama!

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 26 Sept. 2011

Earlier this month, Reese Witherspoon was hit by a car and briefly hospitalized. It was a one day story in the online gossip world and the timing was bad for the supermarket rags. But more than a week later, the Enquirer puts her on the cover with overly sensational headlines.

• Days after being hit by car
• Reese's Brain Surgery Drama!
  
• World Exclusive photos inside
• It could be deadly!

Technically, any strong concussion can turn deadly, but it's rare. For the serious over-reaction, this is a nominee for Meanest Story of the Week.

Breaking news: Reese Witherspoon hit by car while jogging, briefly hospitalized.

(photo from Getty Images)
Publication: Huffington Post
Date: 7 September 2011

The Huffington Post is reporting that actress and recent bride Reese Witherspoon was hit by a car while jogging in Santa Monica and briefly hospitalized. Her representative says she is now home and resting comfortably.

Best wishes to Ms. Witherspoon, her family and friends, from a fan.

Bun in the oven alert™?: Reese looks pregnant!

Publication: OK!
Date: 25 July 2011

OK!, the nicest of the supermarket checkout rags if not the most reliable, tells us little Reese Witherspoon looks pregnant. Here are the headlines.

• Breaking baby news
• First, a dream wedding - now Reese has another reason to celebrate!
  

I should remind my readers that if everything we read on the cover of OK! was true, we would know be hip deep in Kardashian rugrats.

Bun in the oven alert: Reese: baby news!

Publication: In Touch
Date: 18 July 2011

Reese Witherspoon was not a big star in the tabloids last year, but her marriage to Jim Toth was a popular topic in early 2011. Of course, the logical progression of these stories is the preparation of the wedding, the wedding itself, the honeymoon and then the pregnancy rumors.

Reese's story is now in the pregnancy rumor phase.

Love Bird Alert™: Inside Reese's honeymoon.

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 25 April 2011

Reese Witherspoon got married last month already, but the gossip rags are not getting tired of telling us about it yet. Her husband Jim Toth is not mentioned by name, but he does get a picture, so he also gets a label.

This continuing interest might have something to do with Reese having a movie in theaters right now called Water For Elephants, so I'm also giving this story the Planted Crap label.

Bun In The Oven Alert™: Reese and Khloe's pregnancy news

Publication: OK!
Date: 18 April 2011

Once again, OK! shows itself to be positive and unreliable, putting stories about "pregnancy news" on the cover about women who have not said they are pregnant, but that they would like to be pregnant.

Reese Witherspoon would like to have a kid with her new husband. She is not currently pregnant.

Khloe Kardashian would like to have a child with Lamar Odom. She is not currently pregnant.

You're welcome.

Bells Done Rung™ Alert: Pictures of Reese's dream day

Publication: People
Date: 18 April 2011

It stands to reason that THE wedding of the year is coming up in a few weeks in London, but if we look at the coverage in The Only Ten Magazines That Matter, it's Reese Witherspoon's wedding to Jim Toth that is a nearly equal Big Damn Deal. Wills'N'Kate are in the top ten for gossip rag covers for 2011, but that is in large part because the Globe hates them so much and has produced about half the cover stories about them, all negative. Take that one magazine away and the royal couple are neck and neck with little Reese Witherspoon walking down the aisle for the second time, with all those stories having a positive slant.

In accordance with this blog's pro-love policy, we wish the happy couple all the best.

Bells are Ringing Alert™:Reese Witherspoon's big day finally arrives.

Publications: People, OK!, In Touch, Weekly Life & Style, Us Weekly
Date: 11 April 2011

Reese Witherspoon got married last month and her wedding ran the table on the nice half of The Only Ten Magazines That Matter. No magazines in the AMI kennel mentioned her happy day, but all five gossip rags that aren't connect to the Enquirer empire did. Here are the headlines.

• People: Reese's big day plans
• In Touch: Reese baby news
• Weekly Life & Style: Reese's wedding album
• OK!: Reese weds star studded ceremony
• Us Weekly: Reese's wedding
  A-list guests Gwyneth, Kate (Hudson), Scarlett, Renee (Zellweger)
  Their sweet vows, how she included Ava & Deacon
  Plans for a baby

None of the five mention the name of the groom, Jim Toth, but I expect if you are old enough to read this, you are old enough to know that weddings aren't really about grooms, are they?

Bells Are Ringing Alert™: Reese's wedding joy.

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 4 April 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Unlike Natalie Portman, who is ruining the fun for the gossip world by having a quickie wedding, Reese Witherspoon's upcoming ceremony has been planned for months, which gives all the interested supermarket rags plenty of time to put together stories they can talk about on their cover. Weekly Life & Style had the exact same news on the cover five weeks ago, also with no details.

Best wishes to the happy couple, which includes the never photographed groom to be Jim Toth.

Bells Are Ringing Alert™: Reese's Big Day Details. Yet again.

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 28 March 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Us Weekly becomes the third gossip rag this year to give us details about Reese Witherspoon's upcoming wedding. The sub-headline reads:

• The dress, her diet, who's invited

Best wishes to the happy couple, though yet again the name of her intended, agent Jim Toth, is one of those details not important enough to make the cover.

Oscar review

Publications: People, Us Weekly
Date: 14 March 2011

Both People and Us Weekly have cover stories about last week's Academy Awards. Here are the headlines and a list of the celebrities pictured.

• People: Oscar glam! All the dresses, dish and hot pics
  pictures of Sandra Bullock, Colin Firth, Reese Witherspoon, Anne Hathaway
• Us Weekly: Oscars - best gowns, parties, gossip
  pictures of Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Gwyneth Paltrow
  

Bells Are Ringing Alert™: Reese's Big Day Details

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 28 February 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Three weeks ago, People had the story of Reese Witherspoon's upcoming wedding on the cover and this week, Weekly Life & Style decides to go with it as well, though all the promised details are on the inside, including the name of her intended, talent agent Jim Toth.

Best wishes to the happy couple.

Bells are Ringing Alert™:Reese's Wedding Countdown

Publication: People
Date: 7 February 2011

People devotes the lion's share of the cover to the story of Reese Witherspoon's upcoming wedding to agent Jim Toth. Here are the headlines.

• Reese's Wedding Countdown
• Second chance at love
• Why Jim's the one
• Inside Reese's plans for her romantic big day
• Dress shopping
• Can't wait to marry the grown up her friends say she deserves

Best wishes to the happy couple.

Bells Are Ringing Alert™:Stars engaged

Publication: People
Date: 17 January 2011

People has a story on the cover about the celebrities who are recently engaged, but instead of showing several pictures of couples, they go with only a single picture of Reese Witherspoon, who is engaged to Jim Toth, an agent with CAA. Us Weekly speculated about the engagement back in October of last year, but that story was denied at the time.

Best wishes to the happy couple and whatever other happy couples People wants you to read about but won't put on the cover.

Bells are Ringing Alert™:A ring for Reese

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 1 November 2010

According to Us Weekly, Reese Witherspoon and Jim Toth are engaged. She's head over heels in love, but if you think about it, aren't all of us head over heels when we stand up? (I never understood that saying.) Also, her kids adore him and she's ready to take this whirlwind romance to the next step less than a year after dumping Jake Gyllenhaal.

Ms. Witherspoon's spokesperson denies the engagement part.

Bells are Ringing Alert™:Reese's Surprise Proposal

Publication: In Touch
Date: 13 September 2010

Some people the supermarket rags cannot leave alone, like Jennifer Aniston. On the other hand, newly single Reese Witherspoon has not been on the cover of any of The Only Ten Magazines That Matter since May. In Touch says her boyfriend, CAA agent Jim Toth, is about to propose.

Love Bird Alert™:Reese and Jim moving in?

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 31 May 2010

According to Us Weekly, the romance between Reese Witherspoon and the agent she has been seeing is going along swimmingly and the love birds are planning to co-habitate.

His name is Jim Toth, for those of us who have a hard time remembering him.

Love Bird Alert™:Reese falling hard for her new guy.

Publication: People

Date: 3 May 2010

The Gold Standard likes happy stories when possible, and their version of a happy story this week is that Reese Witherspoon, who ended her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal a while back, is now in love. They don't give the name of the guy because he isn't famous. He's an agent at CAA named Jim Toth.

Love Bird Alert™:Reese has a romantic birthday getaway with new beau.

Publication: People

Date: 5 Apr. 2010

This week has been light on stories and heavy on misery. I wasn't able to find two of the ten magazines (they may not publish every week), and Sandra Bullock's woes dominated the news cycle. But this late Monday, we have two positive stories.

The Gold Standard tells us that Reese Witherspoon has a romantic getaway fro her birthday with a new beau whose name is not given on the cover blurb.

This blog is pro-love down to the core and wishes her nothing but the best.

Love Bird Alert™: Reese's sexy new date

Publication: In Touch
Date: 15 Feb. 2010

In Touch has a picture of Reese Witherspoon with someone I didn't recognize but who was definitely NOT Gerard Butler, the other guy she was romantically linked to this week.

We will see how long Reese-mania lasts.

Tomorrow: NEW STUFF!