Hussy alert: Cameron battles Jessica for Justin

Publication: Star
Date: 24 Oct. 2011

Star magazine says the newly single Cameron Diaz is ready to battle for the affections of her former beau Justin Timberlake with his current squeeze Jessica Biel. There was a story about these three in a love triangle back in April 2010, with Justin the man slut as the instigator.

On the rocks alert: Jessica (Biel) betrayed!

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 3 Oct. 2011

Us Weekly has yet another story about man slut Justin Timberlake cheating on Jessica Biel.

I blush to write this because actresses are among the most attractive women in the public eye, but Jessica Biel doesn't do that much for me. Maybe she just doesn't take a good picture.

On the other hand, Justin's alleged latest conquest, Scarlett Johansson, takes a very good picture. Quite often when a celebrity couple breaks up, one party is portrayed as the cheater and the other as the wronged party. In the case of Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett, they both come off as kind of slutty, though Reynolds does get positive stories as a good male role model for Sandra Bullock's adopted son Louis.

Bells Are Ringing Alert™: Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 26 Sept. 2011

The stories of the reconciling of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are just a few weeks old and Weekly Life & Style has a headline that reads "Justin & Jessica: Finally a wedding".

Color me unconvinced.

Love Bird Alert™: How Jessica forgave Justin.

Publication: Us Weekly

Date: 12 September 2011



After the break-up of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel earlier this year, only Us Weekly has taken much interest in either of their romantic lives, with the exception of one story in Weekly Life & Style about Justin and Mila Kunis.



Us Weekly printed a story two months ago that the couple was back together, and now they write a follow-up about how she forgave him, and allegedly there was a lot to forgive. I have found some confirmation online that they have been seen together recently.

Hairdresser and Comfy Shoe Alert:Who's gay and who's not for July 2011.

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 18 July 2011

Fresh trash tomorrow! Last trash of the week... right now!

The Enquirer has its second homosexual speculation cover of the year with a lot of people who haven't been mentioned in any context in the supermarket rags in a year and a half.

Here are the supermarket rag newbies.

• Vin Diesel
• Sarah Silverman (seen kissing Jessica Biel)
• Amy Yasbeck (identified as John Ritter's widow, also shown kissing a woman)

Here are people who have been mention in the tabloids before, though none had been in one of these big gay (or not) line-ups before.

• Jessica Biel (kissing Sarah Silverman)
  
• Kiefer Sutherland (kissing some guy)
• Hines Ward (winner of Dancing With The Stars)
• Wynonna Judd (who allegedly has a gay secret)
• Vanna White (why she's still single)
  

Least interesting cover story of the week: Justin and Jessica dating again!

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 18 July 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! Us Weekly has a headline with no artwork, so I don't include a picture either. In this case, I think they don't have artwork not to be cheap, but to have kind of a "guess who?" situation. When they write "Justin and Jessica dating again!", you have to ask "Which Justin?" and "Which Jessica?"

These are very popular names in the gossip world.

We can eliminate Justin Theroux and Justin Bieber, since neither of them has a particularly famous ex-girlfriend. This leaves us with Justin Timberlake, who has squired many well known women, but the most obviously Jessica would be Jessica Biel in this case.

No need to be amazed, Watson. It was elementary.

Love Bird Alert: Jessica's revenge romance

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 4 April 2011

Last week, the supermarket rags were all over Justin Timberlake-Jessica Biel split, mainly focusing on man slut Justin. This week, only one story and it concerns Ms. Biel's romantic future. (I will call her Ms. Biel because there are way too many Jessicas in the gossip universe. It's like the distaff version of Ryan.)

Welcome back to gossip hell, Gerard Butler! He was one of 2010's most popular man sluts early in the year, romantically linked to both Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon, but it's been nearly a year since he has been mentioned.

There are two major categories of man sluts in the supermarket rags, though they do not mention it directly. There are the honest to God male breeders who can't keep it in their pants, like Justin Timberlake and John Mayer. Then there are the guys who I'm not so sure about, who might be getting these "links" to some serious honeyage to disguise the fact that they play for the other team. Until I see strong evidence to the contrary, Gerard Butler is in Category II.

I mean, really. 300 and Phantom of the Opera? That's a whole lotta gay for a straight guy to be in. The question cannot be ignored.

On the rocks alert: Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are no longer a couple.

Publications: People, Us Weekly, OK!
Date: 28 March 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! The break-up of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel is a done deal, and it produced six headlines on five different magazines with three different slants this week, so I'm writing three different posts, one per slant.

(Is that clear? I'm a mathematician, so it makes sense to me, but I've been in front of enough classes to know that isn't quite enough.)

All these stories talk about their break-up and either blame Justin for being a man slut or leave it vague. Here are the headlines.

• People: Justin and Jessica
  Inside their split
• OK!: Why Justin dumped Jessica
• Us Weekly: How he broke her heart
  CHEATING AND BETRAYAL
  After Justin dumps her, Jessica must finally face the truth about his double life

Like almost all posts featuring Justin Timberlake, this one gets the "man sluts" label. Some of the Hollywood Lotharios romantically attached to several women in the gossip rags may actually be trying to hide that they bat for the other team.

I don't think Justin Timberlake bats for the other team.

Love Bird Alert™: Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis.

Publications: Star, In Touch
Date: 28 March 2010

Fresh trash on Thursdays! We start with the verified story that Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake have separated. In the gossip world, this is never caused by ennui, but instead by dirty sweaty sex with other people. Both In Touch and Star blame Justin and Mila Kunis, his co-star in the upcoming movie Friends With Benefits. Here are the headlines.

• Star: Justin & Mila, the real story
  Their hot PDAs
  inside the split with Jessica
• In Touch: Justin & Mila - how she stole him

Just being clear to anyone reading this blog for the first time, I have no inside information. I just read the tabloid headlines and report on them. But I am giving the man slut label to Justin Timberlake because I really do believe he's heterosexual and I really do believe he'll shag anything hot in a skirt.

On the rocks alert: Renee Betrayed by Bradley

Publication: Star magazine
Date: 28 March 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! There is a lot of fallout from the confirmed break-up of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel this week, and this story is the detritus farthest from the scene of the crime. Star has pictures of Bradley Cooper with two different actresses out in public, which obviously means they are shagging like wild weasels either just prior to or just after the public photos are snapped. Cooper is seen with Jessica Biel in a picture that looks real dated February 26 with the caption "caught cuddling", though it just looks like a Hollywood "hello" hug. There is also a picture that could be photoshopped with Sandra Bullock dated March 5 captioned "sneaking out".

I am not giving Mr. Cooper the man slut label because the evidence is just too skimpy.

UPDATE: Since the break-up of Bradley Cooper and Renee Zellweger is all over the place on the supermarket rag covers the week after this story, this gets a belated Scoop of the Week label.

Breaking news: Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel call it quits.

You can find this story all over the Internets, so I am not going to give a specific source, but Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel have made it official that they are no longer a couple. This picture is from a Laker game last year when Justin saw them up on the big screen and decided dry humping her would be the funniest thing anyone ever saw.

Timberlake's most recent success on screen was playing a man slut in The Social Network. This was not a stretch for him. Every story about him last year in the supermarket rags was a story about him cheating on her.

This is the first mention of either of them this year on the blog, but I expect The Only Ten Magazines That Matter will be featuring both of them more prominently in the weeks and months ahead.

Man Slut Alert:Justin caught cheating with Olivia Munn

Publication: Us Weekly
Date: 8 November 2010

Yet again, Justin Timberlake is accused of cheating on Jessica Biel, this time with Olivia Munn, host of Attack of the Show and sometime correspondent on The Daily Show. Yet again, there are NO photos of them together to be found on the Internet, but that's not proof they didn't hook up, now is it?

Man Slut Alert:Justin Timberlake betrays Jessica Biel

Publication: Us Weekly

Date: 26 Apr. 2010

Here's the last trash of the tabloid week, clearing the deck for fresh trash tomorrow.

According to Us Weekly, Justin Timberlake is splitting his valuable time between Jessica Biel and Cameron Diaz. Remember that just a month ago, he was linked to a stripper, so he definitely has some serious time management skillz.

The editors of this supermarket rag add the extra detail that he loves being fought over.

And here I just thought he liked to have sex with as many women as possible.

On the rocks alert:Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel

Publication: In Touch

Date: 29 Mar. 2010

Just in case you had forgotten, man slut Justin Timberlake is currently in a long term relationship with actress Jessica Biel, which should mean exotic dancers, tattooed or otherwise, are off the menu. In Touch tells us they are ready to split.