Problems With Plastic Alert and Fussin' and Feudin' Alert: Hillary's secret plastic surgery!

Publication: Globe
Date: 10 Oct. 2011

The Globe continues with the theme that Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton really don't like one another. Here are the headlines.

• After Michelle Obama calls her old, sloppy & fat…
• Hillary's secret plastic surgery!
• Now she's ready to kick the Obamas out of the White House!
  

Weekly World News alert: Hillary served monkey brains at Brunei state banquet.

Publication: Weekly World News (via the Sun)
Date: 3 Oct. 2011

I am at a loss for further comment.

Fussin' and Feudin' Alert™: Michelle Obama insults Hillary!

Publication: Globe
Date: 19 Sept. 2011

The Globe rehashes the story that Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton are at each others' throats. Here are the headlines.

• Michelle Obama insults Hillary!
• It's war!
• First Lady's bitter outburst sparks tearful breakdown

Annoying label bookkeeping for "Who hates who", September 2011

Link to the post above.

Hillary's heart crisis.

Publication: National Examiner

Date: 22 August 2011

Do you believe the low rent Examiner has inside information about the lives of people as protected as Bill and Hillary Clinton? Me, neither! But it's my job on this blog to publish all the headlines on the American supermarket rags, so here's what the low rent Examiner has to say this week.

Hillary has a heart crisis and has had terrifying blackouts this year. Bill has given an ultimatum.

If you believe the low rent Examiner.

Four prophecies for 2011!

Publication: Sun
Date: 20 June 2011

The Sun gives us four prophecies for 2011, but none of them involve the End of the World or even so much as a plague or terrorist attack. Still, they have expiration dates, so they can be tested for accuracy.

Hillary Clinton is going to announce a run for the presidency.

Miss Betty White will buy a baseball team and they will win the World Series.

NASA files reveal why JFK really died.

(Did the shot come from outer space?)

And a weeping statue predicts Billy Graham's last days.

By the end of the year, I will report back on all these predictions.

On the rocks alert: Clinton marriage crisis

Publication: National Examiner
Date: 13 June 2011

There was a time when the Clinton marriage was prime tabloid fodder, but those days are long gone. This is only the second report of a Bill and Hillary Clinton marriage crisis is about a year and a half, and both reports have been in the low rent Examiner. The story says has Hillary packed on 50 lbs. after Bill threatened divorce.

Stay classy, low rent Examiner.

Fussin' and Feudin' Alert™: Kennedys beg Hillary to run against Obama.

Publication: National Examiner
Date: 28 March 2011

Welcome back to gossip hell, Hillary Clinton! For the gossip rags over the past 15 months, Hillary has been the least interesting Clinton, and she's like, you know, the one who actually has an important job in government, but the AMI rags would rather tell you her husband is dying or her daughter is married to a guy going through a breakdown.

In any case, this week the low rent Examiner says that some unnamed cabal of Kennedys are begging her to run against Obama in 2012.

Fun fact: Did you know the 2010 elections marked the first time there were no Kennedys in office since I was a kid?