This week's Kim'N'Kris headlines.

Publications: National Enquirer, OK!, Star, Weekly Life & Style, Us Weekly

Date: 21 Nov. 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays!  There were seven cover stories about Kim Kardashian and her divorce last week, but we are down to "only" six this week.  In Touch focuses on the whole awful clan and the money schemes of Kris Jenner, but the rest are mainly about the newly divorced newlyweds.  Here are the headlines.

• National Enquirer: "Kim's butt is fake!"
  Kris exposes Kim's secrets
  He has video proof - he tells pals
• Weekly Life & Style:  Kim's plan backfires
  Kris won't sign divorce papers
  Reggie refuses to call
  Angry with Mom, she says, "I'm quitting the show!"
  Exclusive interview with his dad: Kris' side of the story
• Us Weekly: Kim after split
  Depressed & Devastated
• Star: Rehab for kim!
  Backlash from marriage hoax pushes her over the edge
  Family turns on her: "You killed the show!"
  A sex tape with Kris!
• OK!: Kim's not back with Kris…
  Kim & Reggie re-unite
  All the details of their sexy hook-up

Leave it to OK! to hold out some hope of a slightly happy ending, her chance to find another guy.  As I have written before, if Reggie Bush really is trying to get back in the picture, he should be tested for concussion induced brain damage. Only time will tell if their story can survive being universally despised.  It certainly didn't help Paris Hilton or Kate Gosselin.

On the rocks alert: The divorce of Kim'n'Kris makes the cover of SEVEN gossip rags.

Publications: People, OK!, In Touch, Weekly Life & Style, Us Weekly, Star, National Enquirer

Date: 14 Nov. 2011

 

Fresh trash... on Wednesdays!  Yes, we get a story covered in seven supermarket rags, the most of any story in at least two years.

It's official!  I now hate Kim Kardashian's guts.  After nearly two years for not caring one way or the other, her obvious timing of ending her marriage for maximum exposure in the supermarket rags convinces me that she is exactly why the 99% should consider our modern society all out class warfare.

Here are the headlines from all seven magazines, which should be counted as a clean sweep. (The Globe and low rent Examiner skew too old for Kris, and the Sun is only interested in the End of the World.)

• People: Kim's 72-day marriage: Mistake or fake?
  The real story
  Exclusive details
  What drove her to divorce now
  Husband Kris blindsided
  Just another reality TV stunt?
• In Touch: $500 Million Divorce!
  The shocking betrayal that could void Kim's prenup!
• OK!:  Kim files for divorce: "We're done!"
  After only 72 days!
  Why Kim felt trapped, embarrassed and tricked
  Kris' ultimatum: "Me or your family"
  He throws a divorce party
  Kim tells OK!: "This isn't easy"
• Weekly Life & Style: First interview only in Life&Style
  Why I left him
  An embarrassed Kim: 'There was nothing else I could do'
  Kris wants the ring back: 'She used me!'
  Ex-boyfriend Reggie asks to reunite
• Star: Kim: single & pregnant
  Divorce bombshell
  Showdown over baby ended marriage
• National Enquirer: After divorce papers filed…
  Kim & Kris' wedding scam exposed!
  photo proof inside
• Us Weekly:  My Big mistake
  Inside their final days
  Why Kim almost called off the wedding
  Their nasty private fights
  Did they marry for love or money?

 I have only one comment.  If Reggie Bush really wants to get back into the middle of this circus, he should get tested for concussion related brain damage.

Bells Are Ringing alert™ and Bun in The Oven Alert™:Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush back together

Publication: OK!
Date: 14 June 2010

OK! uses most of the cover to say that Kim K and Reggie Bush are back together, getting ready to marry and a baby on the way. They also give a large amount of the credit to Kim's pushy mom, Kris Jenner.

This sounds more like a dream Mrs. Jenner had than the actual truth. Stay tuned for further developments.

Bad romance alert: Reggie Bush trashes ex-girlfriend Kim Kardashian to his new girlfriend

Publication: In Touch
Date: 31 May 2010

Something about stopping having sex with Kim Kardashian brings out the worst in guys. Reggie Bush is trashing his former flame to his new flame, according to In Touch magazine.

It's possible he's just trying to make sure the new girl isn't jealous, or it could be that Reggie is upset that Kim met a guy who is in better shape than Reggie and makes more money.

Both theories are plausible.

On the rocks alert:Kim moves out of Reggie's

Publication: Weekly Life & Style

Date: 12 Apr. 2010

Last week, multiple tabs said Kim and Reggie were over because he cheated. Commenter and reality TV expert Karen Zipdrive says the real problem is that Reggie doesn't like having the cameras following him around 24/7. In either case, the relationship looks to be over.

On the rocks alert:Reggie Bush unfaithful to Kim Kardashian

Publications: Star, In Touch, Weekly Life and Style

Date: 5 Apr. 2010

With the Sandra Bullock/Jesse James mess, I gave a separate post to each of the seven headlines this week about their troubles because every story dealt with different aspects of the situation. There were three headlines about Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush, who are supposed to be engaged, and these all said the same thing.

It's over.

According to these reports, Reggie was caught cheating with some blonde.

On the rocks alert:Kim Kardashian's wedding dreams on hold

Publication: In Touch

Date: 22 Mar. 2010

The fresh trash is delivered tomorrow. Until then, this Wednesday is all Kardashian, all the time. In Touch tells us that Kim's dreams of marrying Reggie Bush are on hold.

While I don't watch either, reality TV looks to be a lot like the soap operas, except that no one on reality TV slips into a coma and comes out with amnesia.

I mean, unless you count alcoholic blackouts.

On the rocks alert:Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush

Publications: In Touch, Star

Date: 15 Mar. 2010

Both In Touch and the Star went with stories of love troubles for all the Kardashian sisters.

In Touch says "Ring but no wedding". The Star says "Kim Dumped!"

Bells Are Ringing Alert™: Kim Kardashian's wedding news

Publication: OK!
Date: 22 Feb. 2010

For those readers little versed in reality TV, Kim Kardashian is to booty what Pamela Anderson is to boobies, except that Kim is just showing off what God gave her. She is engaged to Reggie Bush, who now has a Super Bowl ring and will soon have a wedding ring.

I am not a connoisseur of derrieres, but I gotta say it.

Damn. That little girl's got a lot.