Oh, This Is Awkward Alert:Sandy face to face with Bombshell McGee

Publication: Weekly Life & Style

Date: 3 May 2010

It's all Sandy on Sunday evening, and at the top of the page is the least believable story of all, that somehow Sandra Bullock (right) and Bombshell McGee (left), the skanky ho that helped to ruin her life, ended up face to face somewhere.

I write "help to ruin" because, of course, it was Jesse James and his unreasonable penis that really ruined her life. To be fair, Sandy decided he was a good bet, so she deserves some of the blame as well.

Though as I see it, Jesse and his penis get over half of the blame cake all to themselves.

On the rocks alert:Sandra married to a monster

Publication: Us Weekly

Date: 5 Apr. 2010

Is this picture perfect or what? It's just a single moment in time, who knows what happened before or after, but she looks a little tipsy and clingy, while he may be dressed up nice, he's just a villain deep down.

The specific details in Us Weekly are about how Sandy found out, that she's shattered and that the first of many women who said they had sex with Jesse, tattooed fetish model Michelle (Bombshell) McGee, has Nazi connections. Pictures of her wearing swastika armbands have already been published online.

On the rocks alert:Sandra Bullock's husband cheats with fetish model

Publication: In Touch

Date: 29 Mar. 2010

Top of the blog on a Thursday morning is the spot reserved for the best fresh trash. Because of their lag time, it's hard for the supermarket rags to get a scoop, but this one appears to count. Jesse James, the host of the reality TV show Monster Garage, is reported to have had an affair with multi-tattooed fetish model Michelle "Bombshell" McGee. (It's the multi tattoos that give the story the extra zazz.)

Man slut James was formerly married to a porn star. Ms. McGee wants it known that she isn't a home wrecker, just a deceived woman. James had told her he and Bullock were separated, which McGee could see was a lie when she listened to Bullock's Oscar acceptance speech. This was her motivation for coming forward.

Sandra cancelled a public appearance in London last night. Jesse James shut down his Twitter account in the past few hours. This looks like the tabloid story with legs right now, and several of those legs have multiple tattoos.

Stay tuned.

UPDATE: One week later this is the biggest tabloid story around, so In Touch gets a "confirmed" label for getting the scoop on this story.