Whoopi made us homeless.

Publication: Star

Date: 21 Nov. 2011

Star has a picture of two people on the cover this week who claim that Whoopi Goldberg made them homeless.

This is only Whoopi's second appearance on the cover of a supermarket rag in two years.  Last year, the low rent Examiner said Barbara Walters was going to fire her, yet another story that can be confirmed like deaths and births, and yet another one that has turned out to be untrue.

Bells Done Rung™ Alert: Sherri's Dream Day

Publication: Weekly Life & Style

Date: 29 August 2011



Welcome to gossip hell, Sherri Shepherd. Sherri gets about the nicest intro to the gossip rags possible, pictures of her wedding day.



Best wishes to all concerned.

Comfy Shoes Alert™: Barbara Walters' lesbian scandal!

Publication: National Examiner

Date: 22 August 2011



Fresh trash on Thursdays! Is "Barbara Walters' lesbian scandal" already more information than you wanted?



Yep. Me, too.



Stay classy, low rent Examiner!

Fussin' and Feudin' Alert™:Barbara Walters set to fire Whoopi Goldberg

Publication: National Examiner

Date: 20 September 2010



The low rent National Examiner says Barbara Walters is set to fire Whoopi Goldberg from The View. This may be true, but why would anybody give this news to the Examiner? They don't have enough money to maintain a website, for pity's sake. Go someplace where you can GIT PAID, as we say in Oaktown.

Hospitalization alert:The battle to save Barbara Walters

Publication: National Enquirer

Date: 24 May 2010



The Flagship, usually the nastiest of the rags, puts as positive a spin on this story, which was already in the legitimate press since Ms. Walters reported her surgery on her TV show The View. They do not say she is dying or that these are her Brave Last Days, just that the procedure is serious, which is true.



Best wishes to Ms. Walters and her family, but not from a fan.

Love Bird Alert™:Barbara Walters moves in with her boyfriend

Publication: National Examiner

Date: 8 Mar. 2010



More data supporting the idea that the Examiner is the tabloid for very old people. They want you to know that the brazen hussy Barbara Walters is moving in with her boyfriend.



Personally, I think Ms. Walters is just striking a blow for the sanctity of marriage. Since we know that marriage is for procreation and not recreation and Old Babs is now 80, letting her get married is effectively as bad as letting gay people marry, and we know that just isn't done, right?



Good on ya, Babs, you slutty old geezer!