Bun In The Oven Alert™?Baby Boy for Oprah and Gayle

Publication: Globe
Date: 1 Mar. 2010

Before starting this blog, I thought the tabloids were obsessed with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, but what I see now is that after BrAngelina and Jennifer Aniston, the next most interesting celebrity to the tabs is Oprah, though Tiger Woods and his troubles have been flavor of the month for several months now. The Globe says that Oprah is going to have a baby boy and she and gal pal Gayle King will raise him and he will be her heir.

The headline does not make it clear where this golden child will come from. While I understand that Oprah is the most wonderful thing in human history, she is 56 years old and Gayle is 55, both probably post-menopausal, which is the reason for the question mark after the Bun In The Oven Alert™.

To the tabloids, Oprah is Elizabeth I of England, the Virgin Queen. The most fascinating unanswered question is who will follow her and get her fabulous fortune when she is gone. The second most fascinating question is if her fleet will be able to defeat the Spanish Armada when war inevitably comes.